01 July 2009

environmental bulldinky

so, in case u havent heard;

the earth is heating up.

and the blame game is on. too much pollution. natural variation. co2. h2o. h2so4. too many lesbians. something like that. and the solutions are plentyful.

one solution ppl are coming up with is going paperless.

"the paperless society".

woohoo! good idea! lets do it.

as parents we should be diapering our kids in cloth diapers. to save the environment.

use washcloths instead of disposable wipes. to save the environment.

there even are, *gag*, ppl who has done away with toiletpaper, *shudder*. i guess they use towels or cloths or leaves or sumthin. all to save the environment.

i have experience with cloth diapers. the family i used to work for had their kids in cloth diapers - for a while. so the kid is wrapped up in a bulky, uncomfortable, towel thingy, with velcro on the sides. it has a plastic cover so they wont leak, or breath, baby bottom is always wet, gets sore, have to use ointment.... but i digress (btw, did u know "gress" means "grass" in norwegian?).

anyway, this is what happens.

when the kid takes a loooong pee, it leaks out the sides. cloth is just not as absorbant as paper. sometimes kids do little "squirty" pees. then its ok. but many times they let go of a gallon at a time and then its not ok. and some "other" times they have what we would call "the tummy yuckies", and trust me when i say; cloth diapers cant handle it.

so the result is soiled diaper, soiled pants, soiled socks and if u are really unlucky; soiled shoes or couch (keep the kids off of nice furniture if in cloth diapers, just a warning!). if its nighttime, u will, in addition, have soiled sheets and in the case of tummy yuckies, soiled everything from toe to hairline and then some. nothing to do but strip down and throw it all in the laundry. and no short cycle using cold water and tide will clean up the bacteria that lives in and around ur tushie. boiling water and/or bleach. for along time. thats what it takes. of course, bleach is *bad* for the environment. heating water to the boiling point takes a lot of energy, as does running the washer for an hour or two, and if u use a drier....u see where im going? energy in this country comes mainly from burning oil, coal or the likes. bad, bad, bad for the environment. oooor, u can use a diaper service. they come and pick up ur dirty cloth diapers. to drive them, by car, to a place that washes them, in boiling water, with bleach, then drives them back to u, by car.

so, let me wrap this up a little. u use cloth. u end up with; more laundry, laundry that cant be washed in the environmentally friendly short cycle, using cold water. so u spend more energy doing laundry, energy that comes from the burning of fossil fuels, which is the leading cause of global warming. u release big amount of bleach into the environment, which kills plants and vegetation, which ironically, are supposed to soak up the pollutants from burning fossil fuels to prevent global warming. and thats just washing the damned things. then there is bleaching the container where u keep all ur soiled cloths. more bleach. gas for the car who drives this stuff back and forth to ur house... need i go on?

or, if u , to save the environment, choose to wash the soiled cloths on short cycle, without bleach. *shudder*. ull end up wrapping ur kid (or wiping urself) with a towel full of anus-gunk. getting sick only creates more laundry, missing work (in these financially fragile times), seeing a doctor (drive there in ur car?), using medicines (animal testing is not environmentally friendly), etc.

all this to save the environment.

im speechless with appreciation. thank u for taking it upon urself to save us all. and, not to forget, ur never ending nagging about how much u do and how we all should feel ashamed for using evil paper products that kills the earth and blah, blah, blah.

let me tell u. while u are bleaching and boiling and using vast amounts of energy on ur asscloths; *i* throw my paper products in the garbage. my garbage is then hauled away to my towns transfer station, where it will be burned, and turned into energy.

happy environment, everyone.


otter said...

amen sister!

Jess said...

ROFLMAO!! OMG you are so right. Too funny.

PixieFlute said...

Yes, I much prefer being just a light shade of green and sightly chewy, not dark green and crunchy. I like my paper!